Host:

(Pats Microphone) We are bringing to you live coverage of a debate from beyond the doors of the karaoke lounge. This programme is brought to you by the same people who brought to you the debate, which is the same person who’s talking to you now. Without further ado, let’s get on with it!

Morality: Is it morally unacceptable to for organisers to reclaim their monetary losses as a result of the planning of such social assemblies?

Proposition:

Yes

Guests should not be made to pay. It is morally unacceptable. Nobody told us that we had to pay money for attending this event. You say that organisers should be allowed to reclaim some of the money for making the event a success, but we only came in later, and missed out on the earlier events. It is unfair to make us pay when we haven’t seen the food from the barbeque.

Floor: Hey, we paid although we didn’t eat too! Show him the food! That will solve everything.

Opposition:

No

Going back on your argument before, you state that organisers should not make guests pay for the event. However, it is noteworthy that you were not invited to this event in the first place. Doesn’t this ironic comment seem to infringe on moral norms? Using this as a benchmark, there shouldn’t be a moral issue with organisers merely reclaiming monetary resources from the people.

Policies: Should organisers of social assemblies be denied the right to decide the amount payable?

Proposition:

Yes

Hang on let’s go back to what you were saying. I am an uninvited guest? I was invited by my friend, who was invited, which makes me an invited guest. You’re not an organiser yourself, and you’re demanding payment from me. Doesn’t that make you the worst type of hypocrite?

By going along with your little hypothesis, then if I were a terrorist and I was ordered by my friend to kidnap a boy for use in interrogation, it would be morally correct to demand payment from the boy for bringing him to an organised event. That’s ridiculous.

Opposition:

No

You’re getting off topic, but that’s to be expected. You’re obviously someone who lives a life leeching off others and can’t do anything by yourself for nuts. Don’t you realise the topic has moved on to Policies? We should be talking about that.

However, just to satisfy your puny mind, I will dumb myself down so that even you would understand. You completely misunderstand what I’m saying: I’m saying you should pay a minimal fee for participating in the event. And your argument about terrorism is ludicrous. Kidnapping shouldn’t be allowed in the first. We wouldn’t want our kids disappearing all of a sudden because of a madman wearing a mask. Moreover, kidnapping isn’t a primary school gathering event.

The majority rules in a democracy. Nobody shows up for an event uninvited and not expect to pay for anything, everyone on the floor has paid, why shouldn’t you? Majority is the best – to hell with the rest.

Floor: Where is the love… Where is the love, the love, the love…

Human Right: Should such economic policies be seen as an infringement of basic human rights and hence be treated accordingly?

Proposition:

Yes

Are you serious? Just because everyone has paid then I should pay? You dictator! As a member of Al Qaeda, I dare say people like you are often the first to be assassinated. I bet you were picked on by your monitors in school, didn’t you? I know people like you – Knife-toting loan sharks who think they run the world. It is @%$ holes like you who make the government open the Casino in Sentosa.

Opposition:

No

Oh, of course you would be a damned terrorist! And how dare you attack our most prided tourist attraction? Our government is introducing a major source of income for our country and all you do is sit there whining while you’re freeloading off others in poverty. You bomb-carrying, murderous rebel!

Floor: Oh! Baby, baby, baby… Oh~

Social Security: Are the police justified in disregarding such policies taking into consideration its legitimate foundation?

Proposition:

Yes

F$*% you! You stupid, blue-font daylight robber!

SFX – Pow!

I should have expected morons like you to resort to violence!

SFX – Bom! Bom!

Ouch – hey! Where did that umbrella come from? Ouch!

SFX – Piack! Piack! Piack!…

SFX – Bom! Bom!…

Ah! Save me!

Save me…

Save me…

Save me…

Host: This concludes our show for tonight! (Wields microphone)

SFX – Bam! Pfssh… Pfssh… Bam!